Every writer has bad habits. As with any complex skill set, there’s no point at which we become perfect writers. Growing as a writer should be a life-long process, but many of us hit plateaus in our development.
So, which attitudes that stand in the way of recognizing that learning is an essential part of writing? It’s complicated, of course. But one important piece of the puzzle is internalized ableism. What does this mean?
Internalized ableism as an obstacle to growth
The term “ableism” originated in discussions of disability and the rights of disabled people. At its simplest, it means discrimination against disabled folks, analogously with sexism, racism, and similar terms. More recently, its meaning has expanded to include ways in which people often fail to account for the impacts of folks’ disabilities on their everyday lives. For example, telling a person experiencing depression to “just snap out of it” relies on a lot of presuppositions about which actions are available to that person. In this case, a depressed person is usually unable to simply improve their mood and energy, especially on another person’s timeline. The attitude that they should improve at all is itself an instance of ableism.
And we all internalize ableism. In fact, we use this internalized ableism as a way of shaming ourselves when we label our writing habits as “bad.” This happens because we all internalize cultural scripts and expectations, and the cultural scripts around writing work are often profoundly harmful and this harm often plays out unconsciously. For example, we think of writing as a solitary activity. We think about it as coming from some semi-mystical place of inspiration. We sometimes think of top writing skills as the province of some mysterious, innate creative genius.
Illusions about writing are often ableist
These cultural scripts about writing are all misconceptions or half-truths. And when we internalize them, we become our own worst critics. To us as we keep trying to write, sometimes our inability to write, or the occasional clunkiness of our writing becomes evidence that we lack inspiration or that spark of creative genius. And sometimes we turn on ourselves, which further diminishes our ability to get the words we need or want to onto the page! Over months and years the process builds on itself, to the point where our otherwise reasonable abilities to motivate ourselves become an inner form of ableism. We become dissatisfied with ourselves for not producing more, or for not expressing ourselves clearly immediately, or for dreading the task of writing.
Countering internalized ableism is hard because there are many sources and moving parts to these scripts. But it can be done. First, we have to first recognize the harmful ableist scripts we’re repeating to ourselves, usually just at the edge of our awareness. Then we have to gently let them go. And then we have to internalize a few counter-scripts.
Finding new scripts to counter our internalized ableism
First, writing is fundamentally a social activity. Second, writing and inspiration have a complex relationship; instead of waiting for inspiration, we must build habits that make inspiration more likely to arise. Third, most writing skills are learned, not innate.
This is a lot of work, but it’s worth it! Changing our attitudes to writing makes the process more enjoyable and rewarding. The first step, however, is recognizing which attitudes are holding us back. So, what’s the script that most blocks you? How would you talk to a close friend if they were saying these words to themselves? Therefore, how can you be a little kinder to yourself around it?